Employee Assistance Program → Topics of Interest: Negotiating Conflict
We all experience conflict in our day to day life; it can be stressful but also can have a positive outcome. Here are some tips on negotiating and resolving conflict:
Active listening: Demonstrate your interest in the other person with non-verbal cues. Maintain eye contact, don't interrupt, and let the person vent. Clarify by asking questions. More on active listening.
Acknowledge and restate the other person's feelings and concerns.
Deep breathing: Using a deep breathing relaxation exercise helps you to monitor your own stress level. Breathe in through your nose, hold in the air for 3-5 seconds, and then exhale slowly. Repeat.
Maintain your boundaries: Change what you can to improve the situation and let go of what you can't control. Take responsibility for what's yours and apologize if appropriate.
Communicate your own feelings and needs: Utilize I messages. Don't take it personally.
Find points of agreement that you both have in common.
Utilize problem solving skills: Identify the problem concretely, brainstorm solutions to the problem, agree and commit to the best solution, think through the consequences of the best solution, try the best solution, re-evaluate it, confirm details of the solution, and keep your promises.